I’m not joking—I really enjoy it.

I’m not talking about “positive thinking” or affirmations, or anything that lacks complete honesty and authenticity. Let me explain…

About 30 years ago I began to train myself to love paying bills. Someone taught me that if I complain about spending, I will repel money rather than attract money. My observation is that money MUST come and go. Money represents an exchange of energy.

When I pay a bill, I am exchanging something for goods and services I received. Think about it: mortgage and rent payments, car payments, public utilities, grocery bills… these are all things that we choose or can’t live without. You expect to pay for everything you receive, don’t you? Why would you complain?

Of course, we want to earn more income and pay less in taxes, and there are provisions for that—they’re called Deductions. We can legally get a break based on some of the money we spent on certain things—in fact, we are encouraged to do so. As a corporation owner, I am very clear about the laws that dictate how I can spend my income in ways that can lower my tax bill. That’s my responsibility.

Paying my income tax means that I earned money. I am a working member of society, and my work is honest and honorable—and documented. I am doing my part to drive the economy, and I am proud to do that. I pay for the privilege of living in a free society that allows me to do the work I love.

Take my advice. Learn to love paying bills and paying taxes! Choose to exchange energy in your society. Offer something of value and make it excellent, and charge a fair price. Value yourself, your effort, and your result. Be grateful for what you have, and be committed to being an active member of your community.

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Relaxation and Hypnosis are not the same thing. In fact, you can be hypnotized without relaxation. I can hypnotize you standing up in a bus station at rush hour, and you will experience and demonstrate some or all of the effects of hypnosis: heightened suggestibility, time distortion, de-sensitization, and other indications.

Why is hypnosis almost always associated with relaxation? Because they work so well together!

We use relaxation to suggest hypnosis, and we use hypnosis to suggest relaxation, and when hypnotists use this “double bind” as an induction, the effect is wonderfully powerful and empowering, calming and comforting, reassuring and, well, deeply relaxing. Often, clients tell me after a session that they have never relaxed as deeply!

Hypnosis is like stripping away the outside world, layer by layer, until you experience your inner mind in a suggestible state, able to create in a limitless way. You become free of your body and physical limitations. Free of discomfort, worry, stress, tension, regret, resentment, disappointment, and all of the many limiting factors of mind that constantly get in the way. When you experience hypnotic relaxation, you become renewed, regenerated, and rejuvenated. It is a powerful way to recharge all of your batteries and re-boot your systems all in one session.

For the client, it is amazing. For the hypnotist, it is an art, a science, and a philosophy. For me, as a trained and experienced hypnotist, it is an exciting way to help clients who are too stressed to succeed, too worried to feel contentment, and too tense to allow unlimited happiness and success.

There are many ways to find relaxation, and you already know many of them. I recommend all of the healthful ways, and I know that Hypnosis works great in combination with any of them.

If you are stressed, tense, worried, wound up, wrapped up tight, can’t sleep, biting your nails, overeating, smoking, losing your temper, stuttering, twitching, can’t concentrate… What are you waiting for? Don’t attempt to get well before you get help. Get help now, and be well consistently.

Relaxation is the way to let go. Just let it all go in one session and learn how easy it is to enter that state all on your own. I will teach you self-hypnosis, and you will become more successful with everything, over time, beginning as soon as you begin.

Try Hypnosis. It works!

~

Want to try some Hypnotic Relaxation Techniques?
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Here in New Jersey, it seems that everyone wants to be first. I see that while driving, walking, shopping. And try to get a parking space? Fuggedaboudit. I see it in business, too. There is a friendly-but-aggressive way we go about advertising and promoting, and it is also palpable on Facebook. Try a new approach, then see it imitated or duplicated by a local competitor or colleague.

Living in the great Northeast, wanting to be first comes naturally because it is a survival instinct. In this part of the country there are about 930 people for every square mile (on average), so we are sharing limited resources. Survival of the fittest means getting to the table first. It also means getting a seat, an express lane, a shopping cart, parking space, cashier, customer service rep, place on a queue, you name it, FIRST—so that you won’t be last. (If you have any doubt about this, just try cutting into a line anywhere in urban New Jersey or New York.)

This cultural phenomenon is actually a hypnotic effect. We believe it, we live it, we pass it on to our children. Your children are amazingly astute, especially up until around age eight. You can’t fool them. They see and hear EVERYTHING. They know when you are sleeping, they know when you’re awake. You can talk to them about how important it is to be kind, loving, and generous, AND they know when you are cheating, cutting someone off in traffic, lying, rationalizing & justifying, and slighting someone so that you can be first. They hear what you are saying, and they compare it with what they see you doing. Guess which makes the deeper impression!

You were a child once, too, and that is exactly how you learned. You used all of your senses to take in all available information, and then your subconscious made decisions about how you would be in the world, how you would act, strategies for emotional and physical survival, how you would love and be loved, and how much you would succeed. It’s all in there, programmed, in the back of the back of your mind, way in the back. Your subconscious is acting on your behalf, separate from your conscious desires, and sometimes in conflict with them.

I can’t say enough about being kind, loving, and generous. Also forgiving, patient, and tolerant. These are all things that cause us to live longer, happier, healthier lives, and knowledgeable health practitioners all agree about this. Be an active, responsible, fully participating member of your community, and you are more likely to avoid heart disease, depression, high blood pressure, and a host of other maladies that rarely existed in the 19th century.

Being first is deeply woven into the fabric of our lives, especially in New Jersey, the most populous of all 50 states. It’s how we are, it’s what we do. We are hypnotized. That means we have this as a deeply held belief and we will continually do this behavior until we start to practice other behaviors on a consistent, frequent, and regular basis. You can change anything if you think it is important enough.

So: next time you are rushing, trying to be first so you won’t be last, you might just pause for a moment to practice Patience and the other virtues. We say that giving is good for you, but I like my mother’s reason for being nice. She taught me and my brother and sister that being nice is its own reward. It’s simply the right thing to do.

As for me, I’m from New York City and I live in New Jersey. I don’t need to be first—as long as I’m next!

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I knew it was a mistake for me to post some of my political opinions on Facebook. I did it anyway.

I knew it would attract unwanted political rants from friends and others, and I was right. They posted their thoughts, along with a few other folks I’ve never met or heard of, and of course the thread strayed very far from my original message.

That’s not the part that irks me.

I now have a label. It seems that if I’m not verbally attacking the President of the United States, I must be a “liberal.” And if I’m a liberal, I must love some things and hate other things, right? If I don’t refer to the President by a derogatory nickname or denigrate his policies, I must therefore love gun control, Fascism, and Planned Parenthood, right?

Let’s all just take a breath for a moment, please. BREATHE. That’s right, it’s OK to just pause before responding and getting all worked up.

It should surprise no one that we have so many labels for everything around us. We are conditioned for that. Our society demands it, and the conditioning happens in the many messages we are bombarded with every day. The “news” we see and hear is accompanied by opinions, innuendoes, misinformation, disinformation, hate speech disguised as passionate rhetoric, soundbites, and news headlines.

We label because we are conditioned to think and speak in soundbites. Our collective attention span has diminished to the point that we can’t entertain thought for more than a few seconds. We express ourselves thusly.

The truth is, our world doesn’t fit into soundbites, and neither do you, and neither do I. It’s OK to respect yourself by allowing deeper consideration of ideas and people and things. It is better than OK to appreciate the complexity of people, what we think and feel, and how we behave.

The label you are using is shorthand for something that may be true, partially true, or mostly untrue. It is modern-day Newspeak and it it fails completely. It lacks nuance and context, and it does a great disservice to our natural ability to appreciate depth, contingencies, exceptions, legitimate contrary opinions, degrees of difference or shades of gray.

Now, if you are still tempted to argue what “liberal” means, you are simply proving my point. You are way back there, stuck on a label, while I’m getting my point across about how simplistic labels are and how they lack true description and meaning. Labels don’t serve you; they are making you stupid.

I wouldn’t mind being called a “liberal” if I were sure that everyone knows what that means—but not everyone does. It’s simply a way for us all to nod our heads knowingly and move on to another subject. It’s so much easier not to think, isn’t it?

You can call me by all the labels that are true and I won’t lift a finger to sue you: alcoholic, musician, Rosicrucian, short, obstinate, hypnotist, and divorced. But if you call me a “liberal” you are ignoring my natural ability to think, change, and grow.

You can give me a label that I really never wanted, but then of course you will be demonstrating your ignorance of who I am, who I can be, and who I might become.

Ah, modern communication. Gotta love it!

That’s enough for now. Maybe I’ll turn on the radio and listen to some conventional, widely-accepted, standardized hate speech for awhile, just so I’ll know what to expect on my Facebook page in the next few hours.

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Here’s how you can sharpen your writing and your speaking:

Use the Power of Three!

The subconscious mind loves threes, for some reason, and we hypnotists know this, which is why we love to speak in threes. It’s hypnotic. Plus, it just sounds and feels very comfortable to hear words and phrases that are grouped in threes.

Do this: When you are speaking or writing, or if you should happen to Become a Certified Hypnotist in one of my classes this year, write your hypnotic scripts to contain the Power of Three.

Using the Power of Three is simple, it’s easy, and it’s highly effective. See what I did right there? Let me try it again: I bet that with practice I can do it easily, effortlessly, and effectively. There, I added alliteration. I think that you can learn to do this even more effectively because you have wonderful inner resources, you have great motivation to succeed, and you have proven your intelligence many times in your life. Did you count that time?

This technique is used all the time by lawyers and sales people, among many others who use influence and persuasion. Three is the perfect number when presenting choices. With one item there is no choice, and with two, the binary option seems too limiting. Four or more would be confusing. Three is just right! Next time you are presented with a selection of three, notice that the third and last will seem like the best choice. That might be because it is positioned there for you to select it as best.

Here’s a list of common phrases and words that illustrate the Power of Three. Notice the familiarity, and the ease with which your ear and mind absorb them:

This, that, and the other
Yesterday, today, and tomorrow
Past, present, future
Lights, camera, action!
Shake, Rattle & Roll
Me, myself, and I
Beg, borrow, or steal
Spindle, fold, or mutilate
Lock, stock, and barrel
Ready, willing, and able
Ready, aim, fire
Ready, set, go
Ready on the left, ready on the right, ready on the firing line
Left, right, and center
Win, place, show
Win, lose, or draw
Snap! Crackle! Pop!
Turn on, Tune In, Drop Out
Stop, drop, and roll
Stop, look, and listen
Reading and writing and ‘rithmetic
Lions and tigers and bears (oh my!)
Red, white, and blue
Rare, medium, well-done
See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil
Planes, Trains, and Automobiles
Good, better, best
Good, bad, or indifferent
The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Famous trios:
Moe, Larry, and Curly
Groucho, Harpo, and Chico
Manny, Moe, and Jack
Huey, Dewey, and Louie
Kukla, Fran, and Ollie
Wynken, Blynken, and Nod
The Tin Man, the Scarecrow, and the Cowardly Lion
Athos, Porthos, and Aramis (The Three Musketeers)
Melchior, Gaspar, Balthazar (The Three Wise Men, Three Kings, or Magi)
The Father, The Son, and The Holy Spirit

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If you seek help to interpret and understand your dreams, consider this: Your subconscious language is not a universal language. Your images, associations, memories, and feelings are unique to you.

Your subconscious has been growing with you all the time, learning and growing, and running the show in collaboration with each and every cell in your entire body. To a very big extent, your subconscious mind is a function of your brain, and almost completely influenced by the physical and physiological structure of your entire being. I’m not making this up–go ahead and look up the recent neuroscience research. What your subconscious knows and acts upon is a highly individual experience. No one else in the world has experienced Life the way you do.

When you dream during sleep, the images and all other sensory experiences have meanings that only you can interpret, because your subconscious assigns meanings, and your subconscious is unique.

My training and experience have taught me that there are no experts regarding dream interpretation. I am highly suspicious of any person, book, or authority that assigns universal meaning to anything as it may appear in a dream. No other person can claim to know what a cloud means to you, or a chair or a book—especially if you have had significant experience in a particular area of Life.

I can help you to interpret your dream. I do this sometimes with clients. But I only help you to discover, using a context of understanding the purpose, nature, and function of dreaming. I also rule out physiological causes. We all know that your dreams can be particularly bizarre if you have a fever or other kind of illness. Some kinds of dreams are easily explained by recent stress or trauma.

I would never in a million years tell you what your dream means to you. It belongs to you. You created it and experienced it. I wasn’t there. And I wasn’t there through any of your formative years, when your complex mind learned to associate experiences, knowledge, fears and fantasies, over-heard conversations, and scenes from books and movies.

As you go about your quest to understand dreams and dreaming, caveat emptor. “Let the buyer beware.” You may be comforted to hear some affirmations, but how can your dream “interpreter” know your subconscious language?

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Happy New Year, my Friends!

I recently conducted my 800th client session, and my busy season is in full-swing. Here are a few things I’ve learned over the last few years, shared with you if you have any interest…

See the world the way your client sees the world.

It’s not what we say; it’s what they hear.

Learn to listen, REALLY LISTEN to every client, and get to the heart of the matter.

Motivation and leverage are what get things done. Make sure you understand the client’s motivations and use them to help them spring forward. Your reasons and motivations for change have nothing to do with your client’s experience. It’s all about empowering the client.

It takes awhile to get good at this. Keep going!

Keep meticulous client records of what you do in each session, and study them.

Track your business. Know how much you are earning and spending, including income taxes. Know the number of clients, sessions, and clinical hours that you are accumulating. Take note of trends.

Manage your client’s expectations. It’s not likely that every client will become 100% successful after one session, but if they can get 20% success and they see the evidence of their success, they will be encouraged to keep going. Small successes lead to greater success.

You need not terminate a client after one or two or three sessions. If they want more support, give it to them. Allow them to be successful.

Clients will have varying degrees of success. There are reasons for this and we know what the reasons are. Sometimes a client will do better at a different time of day, or different time in their lives. Sometimes they are too resistant or fearful of change. Sometimes we need to find the right approach or technique.

Every client has resistance, skepticism, doubt, denial to some degree. As long as their willingness is stronger than their resistance, we’re in business.

It takes awhile to get good at this. Keep going!

Educate your client that they have to take responsibility for themselves. Give them some homework to do for this process to be highly effective. This is why you need LOTS of tools in your toolbox. It’s your responsibility to help them find the tools that are best for them.

Go to classes and conferences, seek out your colleagues and get together with them to discuss ideas and talk shop. Create a study group or symposium. Internet is valuable, but showing up in person and participating with others is more powerful.

Read all of the classic hypnosis texts and try out every tool that you come across. I’m willing to share my reading list with you.

Take advantage of World Hypnotism Day and use it to promote what we do. It’s just silly not to.

Depth of hypnosis is not as significant as Suggestibility and Receptivity.

Train the subconscious AND the conscious mind. The best, most effective suggestions I give are the very first ones: “We are going to have a magnificent session!” Let your face reflect your conviction and passion, give it some energy, and your clients will be influenced by your enthusiasm and confidence.

Learn and master at least five or six inductions: Progressive Relaxation, Ericksonian, Confusion, Rapid, Progressive Neuro-muscular, Arm Raising, etc. Master them so that you can induce hypnosis without reading a script, and be able to combine them and improvise as necessary.

It takes awhile to get good at this. Keep going!

Always include suggestions for well-being.

“Don’t take the credit, don’t take the blame.”

Click here to go to my Facebook business page.

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A question just came up about my credentials. Here is my answer:

My academic background is in Communication and I have a Master’s Degree in Communication and Information Studies from Rutgers University, New Jersey, US. My interest at the time of my early studies was in Organizational Communication and that was also the subject of my dissertation. I eventually began to study interpersonal communication and relationships. At this time in my career and studies I am interested in intra-personal communication: how a person communicates with the self. How do we manage change? Why is it easy or difficult? What are the processes, how do we learn them, and why do we seek or avoid them?

I began my Hypnosis studies and my private hypnotism practice in 2008. I conduct private sessions, group sessions, and I also provide entertainment in a most respectful way. I am certified by two schools, with about 350 credit hours of training. I attend two international hypnosis conferences every year and this year I was honored to teach seminars and a workshop at both. I also have a school, the Open Mind Institute of Hypnosis where I certify professionals. My current project and quest is to have my school approved by the State of New Jersey.

To date, I have conducted more than 750 sessions and approximately 1,400 clinical hours. I am not a doctor, psychiatrist, or psychologist and I do not conduct psychotherapy sessions. I do not diagnose, treat, heal, or cure. My specialties are Stress & Anxiety Reduction, Smoking Cessation, Weight Loss, and Dealing with Chronic Pain. I refer to and consult other professionals all the time, such as doctors, psychiatrists, psychologists, attorneys, massage therapists, chiropractors, acupuncturists, registered dietitians, and law enforcement as a way to help my many clients. I work within the law at all times and I adhere to the Code of Ethics of my profession.

My clients include people from all walks of life including doctors, psychiatrists, psychologists, and just about every kind of holistic practitioner you can think of—and we refer clients to each other and I am always willing to exchange services. I am happy to say I have never turned down a client in need, although several times I have declined to work with medical and psychiatric issues, referring them to other professionals for more appropriate care.

If you would like to know more, just give me a call, I am always happy to talk about what I do. You are also welcome to schedule a free consultation with me, over the phone or in my office. Yes, FREE. I have 20-30 minutes on certain days. I will answer all of your questions and I will not pressure you to make an appointment. My most successful clients are intelligent people who want to improve, and they come forward when they are ready to begin.

My Facebook page is here: http://www.Facebook.com/TranceFormationHypnosis

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I first became interested in hypnotism as a child, thinking that the most valuable use for it would be to get people to do whatever I want them to do.  That seems to be a very appealing notion for a youngster—to have such power!

Later, as a teenager, I wanted to use it for myself in order to overcome shyness and become a fabulous success.

Some years after that, and after a few bumps in the road, I finally settled down to study Hypnotism and practice it as much as possible and really learn it for myself. The learning began when I was able to let go of wanting any material gain from hypnotism. Hypnotism is a fascinating natural gift that anyone can have.

Now that I am fully established in my practice, with much experience and strong ties to the community, I find that my self-hypnosis is stronger than ever, and it translates to the work I do with clients.

This year I had to get really honest with myself. I had gotten so busy in my practice that my personal habits were slipping. I do a lot of business networking—really, a lot of networking!—and everywhere I went there was another buffet, dessert, a bagel and some cookies. I put on about 20 pounds without noticing much, and I stopped working out.

Of course, there were many indications that my condition was changing, because I listen to my body.

At some point I realized that I stopped practicing the principles that I preach. No one is going to want to hire a fat hypnotist. And if I’m not willing to do the work to improve my Life, how could I ask anyone else to do it?  No. If I am to be a true Inspirationist, I must live the principles and have them alive in my Life.

These days I am practicing self-hypnosis every night, right before sleep. I have learned—and I have proven—that whatever the conscious mind thinks about just before sleep, is repeated all night long in the subconscious mind.  Of course, there is a right way and a wrong way to do this. I teach my clients how to do it for themselves, for the best success they can have.

I make sure that my learning and effort to improve myself has the most altruistic goal: to be of service.

So, how does altruism work for a businessman who is a professional hypnotist? Simple. The clients I serve must pay, because they must give something in return for the value they receive. That is true for everything in Life. To get love one must show love. To earn money, one must sell something of value. To get anything, there must be effort, willingness to trade—a transaction of some kind.

My time and effort have great value because of the effort I continue to expend to improve myself, my knowledge, and my expertise. 

I charge for my services because I am willing to apply every bit of knowledge and effort to every client who sees me.  I am working for them, I love what I do, and I am always eager to help them get what they need.  My goal, always, is to teach them how to use Hypnotism for themselves.  Once you receive the great gift of Hypnotism, you can never lose it or forget it, and no one can take it from you.

I have expanded my business to include group hypnosis sessions and workshops that I provide to the general public, and I’m thrilled to say that this foray into the community has been very well received! 

The next workshop will be held on December 15 in Red Bank, NJ, and I would love to see you there.

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